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THREE KEY STEPS AFTER YOU SET YOUR GOALS ( Feb 2007 )
Simply, put after you've created some exciting goals for yourself which are clear, compelling and time-based, you need to think about the following:
1) Rehearse: Spend time and resources thinking of what you'll need to get there. It could be getting good at a specific task, and only practice, like a concert violinist aiming for the best performance, can deliver the outcomes
2) Rehearse: Your mental picture of what sequence of tasks you'll need, what you'll say to key stakeholders in winning them over, countering objections or simply creating a motivating future reality for them
3) Rehearse: by seeking peers who will assess your ideas and proposals. In many industries, critical pitches for multi-million dollar deals are done first by assessment by a ' Red Team". These Red Team reviews comprise of toughened peers who will look at your ideas or proposal like a potential buyer. Intimidating thought, but what a great way to get the best possible result.
Studies have shown that mentally rehearsing your steps to the goal beats self help gurus' advice about visualising goals as being the key to success. So rehearse, rehearse, rehearse!
QUICK TIPS IN OVERCOMING DAILY CHALLENGES ( Mar 2007 )
Here are some easy to remember steps in tackling adversities.
ONE: identify the nature of the challenge e.g scolding by the boss, teenage child tantrum, missed bus.
TWO: allow yourself to feel frustrated for a minute or less - no more. This might be the hardest part to do
THREE: Check what you believe about the challenge or setback in relationship with your desired outcomes. Inother words, put some perspective in what you are facing. Is the setback ' fatal' to your success? What resources do you have to overcome, sidestep this setback or problem? How massively impactful is it - really - in your ultimate goal? Research has shown that people who learn to wallow in helplessness will become helpless. People who look towards setbacks as external forces that they can tackle - get better results.
Your beliefs will affect your future actions ( or inaction ) leading to results. If you dislike the results you are getting now when you reacting the same way to the same old stuff at home or in the office, than you might want to strat changing these beliefs.
FOUR: Challenge your disempowering beliefs. Will the boss " never change"? Really? Do your kids " always misbehave"? Look closely at the language you are using. You might be the biggest catastrophiser in your life!
SELF-ASSURANCE - WHY SELF-ESTEEMING ALONE DOESN'T REALLY WORK( Apr 2007 )
Self-esteem could be defined as: What our unconscious believes to be true about how worthy, lovable, valuable and capable we are. While self-esteeming techniques such as positive self-talk may have positive effects, more lasting effects can be had if the following is considered:
a) Learn to do something well:
A huge chunk of self-esteem comes from acquiring skills in an area close to our interests, and doing well at it. Success creates greater assurance that we'll be successful again the next time or do even better with a heightened level of self-esteem and confidence. Positive thinking and self-talk with no real foundation leads to a disconnect with reality and can usually bring you down even further. So, to feel good about ourselves, start doing some things well.
b) Look to your Language:
Hundreds of studies aligned with belief that helplessness is linked to our own interpretation of events (See Seligman[1990], Stoltz[1997] ), and whether we see events and challenges as Permanent, Pervasive and Personal. In the worst case, our language is based on all three 'P's which then create a sense of hopelessness and lack of empowerment. This is because we would have trained ourselves to believe that the negative event / situation will
(i) never change
(ii ) affects everything we do, and
(iii) is due to our fault exclusively.
For e.g. " The boss is ALWAYS criticising me, EVERYTHING I do must be really bad. I'm really a bad personal assistant ". The opposite extreme mindset would be e.g. " The boss was critical of one of the four reports I gave him, I must have overlooked to include key information. I need to me more mindful about those kind of reports that can trip me up". More of this later
c) Get rid of self-limiting attitudes:
Again, listen to your language. Have you heard these words as your internal dialogue with yourself?
" Oh, I couldn't do that - I'm no good at ______"
" I don't really deserve this promotion."
" It can't be done, it's been tried a few times without success."
If it fits your outcomes, challenge these with questions of rigour - these include " Says who?” " Specifically, what is it that stops me? ", " How effective were the last few attempts, and what can be done to make them more successful?"
Try out some of these Self-Assurance tips and let me know how well it works for you and what you've found out about being a more effective leader.
BEING PRO-ACTIVE PAYS OFF! ( May 2007 )
Studies in human resilience (Russell, Henderson,Siu ) show one of the key dimensions of personal abilities to ccope with change without becoming dysfunctional is the ability to be pro-active. This refers largely to developing an attitude that places the onus on us to take responsibility for our outcomes. Some quick pointers to help you this month:
a) Don't wait for things to happen - make them happen.
Much handwringing can be avoided if we don't care who does the job so long as it gets done, and that the outcome is the one we wanted. Apportioning credit et al can be, is so wished , done later. But if a task that is critical to success is left undone, no one can succeed
b) Plan your action instead of waiting for things to happen.
As they say fail to plan and you plan to fail. Take stock of where you want to be, and look at specific steps to get there
c) The act of being pro-active suggests you have an anticipation that you action will bring the desired results. Just this action may well enhance your self-efficacy -that you are going to succeed to some extent in whatever that you do
d) Being pro-active focuses your energy.
Energy flows where attention goes, as directed by intention. By making our intention known and taking action, we dissipate less energy in wasteful and unconstructive activities
Let me know if any of these pointers have made a different to you today.
LAWS OF CONNECTION: why being socially connected matters! ( June 2007 )
Studies in human resilience (Werner, Smith, Russell) show another key dimension of personal ability to cope with change without becoming dysfunctional is the ability to be socially connected. Being socially connected helps youths and adults rely of a network of support, physical and psychological, in overcoming daily and catastrophic changes. Werner's 30 year study on resilience showed youths in risk environments often succeeded because of a single, stabilising and positive relationship ( often a single parent ). So what have you been doing to up your Resilience Quotient?
Consider the growing impersonal nature of life on our cities and the lack of community responsibility or spirit - and their impact in tough times
A few things YOU ( yes, you! ) can do to help others and yourself.
a) Be accessible- instead of blocking people from your life, learn to filter those who you can be polite to, and those whom you wish to have, or continue a relationship. Be open to meetings, lunches and fun - where possible . Make an effort
b)Be part of a community - be it your spiritual, sporting or professional circle, ask yourself when ( if ever ) you participated in networking or activity session. The past few recessions have shown better-connected people do better in terms of seeking help, advice or referrals when time are bad.
c) Strengthen and grow your network of those close and far -- know just who are merely business acquaintances, and those who should be closest and dearest to you. As one person described it: " relationships are like trees, you need to water them from time to time with your presence so they can thrive". Call that friend or relative and ask them out for a meal - do it today.
BIGGEST MISTAKES SPEAKERS MAKE - AND HOW TO AVOID THEM - PART 1. ( July 2007 )
Want to be motivated to give a great presentation when asked to deliver one? Read on, and avoid these common mistakes that even experienced speakers make, and make your presentation dynamite!
a) LACK OF FOCUS: In the rush of things, too many speakers feel they need to cram in as much information as possible in a presentation. Consequences - lack of focus, or an information overload. For a typical 30 minute presentation, you should be focused on making at most 3 -4 points. The rest of the time is spent reinforcing the points with relevant stories, pictures, video and examples. Remember, that not everyone absorbs information the same way. Do you prefer your audience to be squinting at a text-dense Powerpoint™ slide, or listening to your message/point?
b) PRESENTING A HANDOUT AS YOUR PRESENTATION: Shoot yourself the next time you present more than a few lines of text on Powerpoint. If you MUST include bags of information, dense graphs et al - create a totally separate handout that supports your presentation.
c) BEING A TALKING HEAD, OR A ZOO TIGER: Speakers often feel ' safe; anchored to a podium, when in fact, they could be enhancing their presentation by putting their whole body into the presentation, using their body language, gestures, postures and body ' shapes' to drive home their messages. Plan to step away from the podium and present on stage in a relaxed collegial manner.
Depending on the height of the platform and podium, some speakers become ' talking heads' with only their heads or upper shoulders visible to an audience. The other extreme is that when they move away from the podium, they pace up and down the stage; or move aimlessly on the stage, fretting away nervous energy, very much like a caged tiger. Stand still when making a key point, and move only if you need to - purposefully
d) TELLING JOKES: I once listened to another speaker sprinkle his message liberally with jokes and one-liners for 20 minutes. It only served to confuse me about the point of his message, as none of the humour was linked to the message. Learning point: Choose humour wisely, and ensure it enforces or supports a point you are making
Which of the above have you been guilty in committing?
BIGGEST MISTAKES SPEAKERS MAKE - AND HOW TO AVOID THEM - PART 2. ( Aug 2007 )
Want to be motivated to give a great presentation when asked to deliver one? Read on, and avoid these common mistakes that even experienced speakers make, and make your presentation dynamite! If you missed Part 1, let me know and i can email it to you.
a) WEAK OPENERS AND CLOSERS: When I was much younger, I loved to learn and demonstrate magic tricks. One of the key things about pulling off a great magic show applies to you as well if you are doing a spot of public speaking, and that is: 1) first, grab their attention, 2) add super-attention, 3) leave then wanting more. If your opening is weak, you *will* fail to sustain the audience's interest. Open with a powerful story, quote or define what you hope to achieve in the presentation. These are less of a cliche than a tired joke. Finish or close with a story, metaphor that honours the content of your presentation, and will be ' sticky' with the audience, and likely to be recounted or remembered for a long time.
b) TOO MANY POINTS: It's tempting to pack the presentation with lots of content to deliver ' value'. The real test of value is what the audience remembers and wants to copy/do to help their condition in the next month or so. As such, focusing on just 3 - 4 points, supported by evidence, stories, case studies - is a much better option than covering too much ground and overwhelm your audience. It also allows you to shorten stories , drop supporting anecdotes if you are running out of time without sacrificing your key points ( see point below on RUSHING )
c) RUSHING: when you are running short of time! If you have rehearsed your presentation, you will realise that some parts of your presentation need to be dropped in order to have quality ( vs. quantity ). You choose which bits need to be left out. The key is pacing annd rehearsing before the big event.
d) FAILING TO STAY IN THE REAL WORLD: Acknowledge noises, e.g a beeper that goes off, a crash of breaking plates - in your auditorium. To rattle on without doing so makes the audience feel uncomfortable , as well as wondering why the speaker didn't react to that awful noise from the back. With practice, and some presentation coaching, you can also learn how to use such external hiccups or inteference to your advantage and boost your presentation quality
Drop me a line if you need to know more.
PERSPECTIVES - GAINING NEW INSIGHTS FOR OLD PROBLEMS ( Sep 2007 )
In a survey a few months ago by UK insurance company Norwich Union, it found that 25% of respondents say that they were planning a vacation next year. While some were intending to spend their vacation time with family, over 75% intended to spend their vacation time volunteering or mountaineering.
More people are heading towards a blend of "voluntourism ", and adventure-based trips to recharge and develop new thoughts about their professional and private lives. A couple of years ago, members of PriceWaterHouseCoopers in Singapore participated in an extended community outreach project to Bhutan where partners from various practices contributed expertise to Bhutanese business and public organisations. Both parties received significant personal and professional enrichment as a result. Over here, we offer, on a custom basis, the Leaders' Summit Academy over 5 days or 16 days on Mount Kinabalu and the Everest region respectively; with each programme completer with a risk perspective profiling assessment, on-trek coaching and leadership sessions.
What can we do when seeking fresh perspectives to old problems?
1) Seek A Different Environment: A DDB fun guide for creative blockages suggests going somewhere else to thinkabout the problem. Staying in the same room/office only helps to reinforce the same environment that might have created the problem
2) Seek to be Inspired: An extension to the point above - do you have places which inspire you? The mountains have always provided a testing ground for teams and individuals in a dramatic setting. Just recently, my acquaintance who works at Credit Suisse went to the India Himalaya for a re-charge - and what betterplace than these great places. Do some pieces of music inspire you? Again, play them, often.
3) See the problem from a totally weird or different angle: have you encountered the ho-hum example of the 'half empty/full glass' at corporate training sessions? Instead of a half full or half -empty glass, there are actual two more possible answers to the question " Is the glass half empty or full?" Want to know what these refereshing answers are? Scroll down....
Answer 3: The glass is ALWAYS full. It's half full with air, and half full with water!
Answer 4: The question is the wrong one. The question should be " is the glass the right one for the quantity of water in it?"
In conclusion, gaining new perspectives demands a change where we are and how we look at the existing parameters and perceived constraints.
Have an inspiring October ahead solving ' old problems'
WHY TEAMBUILDING DOESN'T WORK - AND WHAT DOES ( OCT 2007 )
Are you wasting valuable training and operational dollars?
We've all been there before. A senior management meeting, message or conference includes a fun ' teambuilding' event where everyone gets engaged in some team activity or challenge.. And every year people look towards it with mixed feelings as they, and large numbers of colleagues participate in activities from laser shoot-em ups to go-kart racing and rah-rah events. A week later, managers are wondering why their teamwork is still mediocre. The truth is that almost every dollar spent on these feel-good programmes has an extremely low return on investment.
People who are in a decision-making position in your company that sees them buying services of such team events/programmes, will continue to waste your company's funds and here's why:
1) the vast majority of decision makers fail to distinguish between teambuilding processes and outcomes, and team bonding events. The latter produce very little real ROI except provide some pleasant distraction for your staff for a day and some very temporary heightened sense of well-being. Their decision to buy into such a programme is largely focused on what games and activities that will be provided and at what price.
Some even opt for potentially destructive activities like combat simulation or paintball events where latent grudges and ill feelings can surface. Actual teambuilding programmes are geared towards producing a certain outcome e.g. enhanced intra-team communication, and use the actual experiential activities merely as a platform from which group learning and “ ah-ha's “ of the day can be transferred back to the workplace by experienced facilitators trained in experiential learning methodology
2) the vast majority of buyers of teambuilding programmes have also not done any quantitative employee or team climate-study. Unless they know what their team is like in terms of contextual strengths and weaknesses in terms of specific team behaviours before a programme, how can any teambuilding programme be meaningfully designed for outcomes? At Everest Motivation Team, we use a 56-question online tool, which measures eight key team competencies. After a programme is designed and executed, we follow up with another online staff questionnaire to see which areas the programme has impacted. The qualitative and quantitative results represent the client's ROI.
It amazes us how so few potential clients actually care about how their dollars are being translated into future positive team behaviours that help the bottom-line.
3) The vast majority of decision-makers only want to see a team event as a one-off, and never integrated into a greater plan of leadership or team development. In short, they are committed to a great day out, and less to sustainable results. Ever heard of a great team that was created in a day? Look at your spending on “ teambuilding” compared to sales, communication and such skills-based training costs. Without the platform of what we call Specific Observable Behaviours (or SOB for short), few of these training measures are sustainable as poor team behaviours hobble them in the medium term. Teambuilding is a process, not an event.
Unless your staff really need a team bonding experience like going for a bowling session, karaoke, what they might really benefit from instead is attending a fun, teambuilding programme designed to help them back in the workplace.
Here's how you tell the difference...[ for the rest of this two-page feature, download the PDF immediately at http://www.everestmotivation.com/EMTdownloads/teambuildingfails.pdf
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